Things To Miss About Hamilton #3: Waterfront Trail Torture

Goddamn, I miss running. I miss it as much as wine enemas.

I ran the 30k, and now I'm over it. But one thing I do miss was the training aspect of things, specifically taking Chewy for a run around the water.

You see, the training for the race, on my part, was pretty lackluster. I didn't follow the training program. I was lazy. I didn't stay on a clean diet. When it rained, I stayed home. I didn't run in a group. I thought groups were gay.

My running group was made up of myself and my dog Chewy. We'd run a little 2.2k trail around the water every night after work. Sometimes we'd run it a few times, but mostly one lap was enough to break us into a sweat, and we'd just head home.

But on Sunday morning, Chewy would always be game for our torture run on The Waterfront Trail.



So every Sunday morning, we'd start from our house, down to the Bayfront Park, going to Cootes Paradise, going up The Stairs Of Death onto York and try to limp back home.

5.5k.

It's a great wake up if you're still hungover from the night before. Just ask your liver and kidneys.



What Chewy and I both enjoyed are the views. Myself, the sun slowly shimmering across the water, and for Chewy, all the ducks and geese close to the shore, teasing him. It is quite a sight, though. It made some of the pain go away. And it was quite a workout, trying to hold the stupid dog back from taking a swim.

To give people proper warning, the trail is just that . . . a trail. There's no lavish access points along the way, no mini malls, no parking for your big cocksucking SUV. You go in with your bicycle, your rollerblades, or just your legs. But if you get stuck, you're fucked. There's nobody to call to come and get you, unless you can swindle some fucker to bring his boat to where you are. So when you make the decision to go do this, it's iron-clad. There's no turning back.

The Halfway Point (The Stairs Of Death)




Take a deep breath. Don't bypass the stairs and head for Coote's Paradise. It is nice and all, but it will just prolong the agony, taking you all the way to Westdale. Do go up these stairs, swiftly and efficiently. It's the equivalent of doing 75 lunges with weight, so expect a little lactic acid forming in your quads soon afterward.

Almost Home



Let's take a minute. Check out the view. It's nice, with the exception of the steel plant by the water, but let's not get into that.

I do miss the peace and serenity that comes with a run by the water after dawn. It makes all the effort made worth the price of action. By the time we end up on York Street, we're spent. But it's such a satisfaction that doesn't come with a lame running clinic spurring you on. It was my own motivation, and my own goals that pushed my desire to get up early and get it done while other people were still sleeping.

We make the turn to Copps. Chewy and I slow it down.

Then we're home.

Now, where's that WINE for my enema?!