Sunday, October 23, 2011

Download This! You Are The Pilot Of Your Own Pillow w/ CD Cover!

Okay. Enough time away from the internets. Here I make the comeback with a brand spanking new mix for your hibernating pleasure.

Actually, since yours truly can fall asleep to Jawbreaker and Crystal Castles, I suggest that you don't try to fall asleep to this mix. I apologize for the misleading title.

I found that cover on my tumblr and it was so novel, that I decided to use it for myself. If you were lucky enough to get a copy of the last mix, you are aware of the theme. I think this will be the last of the apollo spaceman mix covers that I will continue. There is some continuity to my work, though. My fascination with the astronauts has waned.

Okay, maybe not.

01 you are the pilot of your own pillow
02 lights - siberia
03 monarchy - you don't want to dance with me(moonlight matters remix)
04 poka - lonely nights
05 the rapture - how deep is your love(a-trak dub)
06 groove armada - history(grum remix)
07 big boi ft. yelawolf - you ain't no dj
08 junior senior - can i get get get
09 m83 - midnight city
10 junior boys - bits and pieces
11 chumbawamba - safety pin stuck in my heart
12 foster the people - houdini
13 the xx - basic space
14 breakbot ft. ruckazoid - fantasy
15 michael jackson - beat it(short circuit remix)
16 toro y moi - all alone
17 washed out - before
18 anoraak - night drive with you
19 grum - someday we'll be together

Download HERE


- I loooooooove that new Lights album! I just totally enjoy her writing, her progressions and her minor delivery. It's total genius. Of course, listening to her talk is brutal as hell. Like speaking with my 16 year old daughter. Sheesh!

- Who the fuck does not like Junior Senior? They put the 'fun,' in funky! Check out that sweater! It spells nothing but a good time!

- I found that Chumbawamba track from a compilation called Better Read Than Dead, an Epitaph and AK Press joint venture. It has contributions from J Church, NOFX, Propagandhi, Napalm Death and others, promoting radical literature from their catalogue.

- That Monarchy remix just makes me long for a dank and loud basement bar, where I can just carve my own little corner. I have to go to @disco_punk soon!

Next post: Why JP Arencibia is a lazy fucking catcher, and my year-end observations of your 2011 edition Toronto Blue Jays! Stay tuned!

Friday, September 23, 2011

Jay's Talk!

The regular season is almost over. I haven't gone to a single game. I have observed every match on the TV. I'll have my final quips in blog form shortly.

But for now, enjoy the rest of the final games, then go to this guy's site:
mike wilner's blog

Go ahead and download the podcasts from his Jays Talk call-in program, which occurs after every Jay's game. If you download and listen, you will be treated to some very observant, intelligent people talking baseball, dissecting the game and discussing items rationally. You will also get a majority of retards calling in, talking entitlement(i.e. playoffs) and proposing all kinds of stupidity.

You're welcome.

I personally miss Wednesday night's edition, when a few years back, when much maligned GM J.P. Ricciardi would sit in and answer questions from said retards. It was a brutally honest J.P., fresh from the game's aftermath. His thoughts were always off the cuff, while remaining loyal, he would tear apart his own players and entertain the proposals from all of the dummies who call in.

If there were ever something of a baseball joy, it would be of myself sitting in a car tuned to the AM, prolonging whatever trip I was on, so that I could listen to every breath, every word, amidst all of the crackle of that obsolete media.

I only wish that the new GM, Alex Anthopoulos, would revisit Wednesday nights with the GM . . .

Monday, September 5, 2011

Summer Is All Washed Out

Yep kids, summer is over. Put on your scarves and sweaters, because it's time to get chilly.

Speaking of chill, I've fallen into the 'chill-wave,' fad of bands like Toro Y Moi and the Washed Out. I position them along with all of my yacht-rock like Hall And Oates and shit of that persuasion.

So here's a video of what might have happened during your summer. I assure you that mine wasn't even close. Imagine me a few beer in, grinding out my little dance floor of a corner, and that's almost how my summer went. Enjoy!

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Kat Dennings Was In Town And Nobody Told Me About It?!!!

Holy fuck! Are you guys fucking kidding me?!!!

I got a chance to watch Defendor a little while back, and I'm pretty pissed off that Norah from Nick And Norah's Infinite Playlist, one of my favourite movies of all time, was in my city and I didn't hear about it at all! I'm pissed off beyond comprehension!

As I watched this movie, I recognized all of the landmarks that seemed to be on the obvious side.

I totally saw the Show World peep show back alley from when I used to go there. I remembered all the perverts walking in there with their short gym shorts and no underwear, but armed with lots of quarters. Of course, I only needed 50 cents, and I was ready to go out the back way, into that back alley.

How could you not see the Columbia Chemicals site? They were the only ones on Burlington Street with stacks and stacks of white, blue and black smoke coming out of them consistently.

How about the now-defunct Harvest Burger? That place was an institution! I enjoyed their greasy food, and their ratty fold down chairs, and the bums that hung about in the bar area. I'm soooo happy somebody caught that on film. At least when I yearn for the place, I can watch that scene where Woody Harrelson gets busted by the cops there, over and over again.

And what about Jackson Square? The scene where Kat walks by the dry cleaners her dad owned. Goddamn, I walk through there every week!

I enjoyed Defendor. Like Nick And Norah was a love song to New York, Defendor was, it seemed, a love song to my beloved city of Hamilton.

About the author:

Everytime he arrives to the Hammer, wherever he's coming from, he always mutters, "hello, beautiful," and means it.

Anyway, the house in Hamilton is sold, and I'm off to greener pastures. It might be quite a while before I come back to the big city. I'll miss you, Hamilton.

I love you. Always will.

Saturday, July 9, 2011


This song shows how my favourite derrty bass has come. Good or bad, it still makes the back of my knees sweat.

There's something about a really catchy hook with an unsuspectingly tight groove. It's like watching a slow burn. You can't stay away from it.

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

JoBau Hits Dinger #22, But Who Cares?

ATL 5, TOR 1
I hate losing streaks. I despise of these lulls in the season, where losing streaks extend, and lineups get listless and boring, making the games totally unwatchable.

Oh yeah, Jose Bautista hit one out today, making his home run total for the year a league leading 22.

Unless these jacks come with a win, nobody is going to pay attention.

I hate losing. It puts me in a funk, and I don't desire baseball at all. Boo.

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Catching Up . . .

I love getting stuff in the mail! I got one from a buddy of mine months ago. Just catching it up now. This mix was buried in my car months back from the awful commute. Just popped it back in and is quite enjoyable.

Maybe eventually I'll get around to making a mix of my own. One can only dream . . .

He also sent me a, "may the 4th be with you," postcard in reference to the date and a Star Wars saying.

I forgot to send people to this artist's propaganda site which is chock full of Star Wars thingies. Go here:
Steve Thomas Gallery

He also has a bunch of other artworks with references from various movies. They provide a chuckle, like an inside joke but also quite aesthetically pleasing.

Red House For Sale!

I own a bit of property in Hamilton, and it breaks my heart to part with it. This is, by the way dear readers, the same property where I fell in love with my city.

I built an aluminum shed at the back in the middle of a windstorm. I replaced the roof myself, and had nightmares for weeks about falling off of it. My mother and daughter have both fallen down the stairs, multiple times. The value of the house is waaaaay more than what we've listed for.

Tell your friends, it's priced to sell. Send them to the link below for more info:
232 Bay Street, Hamilton


Somebody's gotta pay for my funemployment!

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Been Away . . .

. . . doing all kinds of things. Now that work has tapered off and I'm back into funemployment for a spell, let me catch you up on some things that aren't vanilla, unlike the uninteresting town that I'm situated in.

Check out my tumblr. It's sad, funny, and has less words and headaches.

You Don't Know Jack!

I pounded on a typewriter all night in my parents' basement with a fury. I wrote it all, and at age 15, thought I knew it all. I had delusions of grandeur, thinking that if I kept them that they'd be worth something. I'm sure these days, they'd be good for a chuckle.

A few years later, I decided to throw away everything that I have written. Prose, poetry, ramblings, all of it.

Jack Kerouac stressed in my mind that you really can't write about anything real that hasn't been lived. Charles Bukowski the same, and he lived it hard. That's the reasoning behind chucking all that work. To do some research.

20 years later, and I'm still researching . . .

(The odd part is, I've adopted Kerouac's stream-of-consciousness style when I wrote my songs. The words are laid-out like one never-ending thought. I saw, years later, Blake Schwarzenbach from Jawbreaker had the same layout in his songs, and even referenced Kerouac a bunch of times in 24-Hour Revenge Therapy, one of my desert island records. I guess I'm not the only one that doesn't know Jack.)


Check out @mopupduty's bio of my favourite Jay so far, Yunel Escobar. Go here.

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Download This!: I Can Feel A Hot One w/ alternate CD cover!

Green one?

Or Red?

Only you, dear readers, will choose.

i can feel a hot one

01 the ashton shuffle - your love (GRUM remix)
02 the naked and famous - punching in a dream
03 robyn - dancing on my own
04 the new pornographers - sing me spanish techno
05 asobi seksu - perfectly crystal
06 the pains of being pure at heart - heaven's gonna happen now
07 manchester orchestra - i can feel a hot one
08 peaches - boys wanna be her
09 sicko - little star
10 owen pallett - scandal at the parkade
11 freelance whales - hannah (ra ra riot remix)
12 kriss kross - jump
13 calvin harris - awooga
14 holy ghost - wait and see (CFCF remix)
15 MSTRKRFT - beards again
16 kenneth bager - i can't wait (alex metric's back to '99 remix)
17 poka - believe
18 passion pit - eyes as candles
19 the strokes - i'll try anything once

download link here


- My friend Derrick from work always talked about his dreams of a punch-up with Mike Tyson. Too bad he often woke up next to a crying wife. The Naked and Famous song sounds quite fitting. Here's to domestic violence! Hurrah!

- My world is currently caught up in mixtape podcasts from GRUM and Human Life at a site called You can find the GRUM podcast here, and the HL one here. GRUM put on a mash-up of Chelley's "Took the Night," vs. Hall and Oates' "Out Of Touch," and it totally knocks my socks off! From beginning to end, I can't stop listening to it.

- The Kenneth Bager to Poka transtition was totally intentional. Human Life put it together in one of their mixes and they worked seamlessly. I just downloaded a copy of this program called Virtual DJ, and put these two songs together at first try. To quote a term from my Industrial Engineering course, it's "poka-yoke," or Japanese for "mistake-proof." Notice the "Poka," reference. Try the program out yourself. It's another time waster. Like this blog.

- Asobi Seksu means "sporty sex," in Japanese.

- Nothing really groundbreaking here, just stuff I wanted to put on a mix for awhile. The Peaches, New Pornographers, and Sicko have some age to them. I missed the bus on Kriss Kross, so I decided to put them on, too(see what I did there?)

- The title is from the Manchester Orchestra song. The line, "And the Lord showed me dreams of my daughter/She was crying inside your stomach," is beautiful and moving. Totally unrelated to anything in this mix. But hell.

- Don't think that I'm not watching baseball at all around this time of year. That's pretty much all I'm doing. The Jays are good to watch, scrapping for runs and making the opposition, whichever one, look like a bunch of goofs that can't throw or catch the fucking ball. Good stuff to watch, and I hope they sustain that kind of play for the rest of the season.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Cambridge, Lamebridge, Shamebridge!

Everywhere, that is, except for goddamn Cambridge, fucking Ontario! Cambridge blows! It's full of countryfied peckerwoods straight from the farm!

Sudbury had more things happening than this lame town. I will never have an affinity with this hole of a town.

Cambridge is like the taint of the Earth. Brantford can be the balls. Agree? Like the new banner? Two words. FUCK . . . OFF.

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Not A Desk Jockey!

I do have to say that my last position of being behind a desk didn't work out so well.

Imagine working for a fuckhead like Lenny Dykstra, who couldn't open up a computer and doesn't use his head for more than a hat rack, but believes in getting rich quick and abusing his workers with fear.

Yeah, that's who I had to deal with.

Back on the docks again, with my steel toes.

Sorry about the lack of posts, people. I apologize.

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Big Disappointment

Alas, I won't be making it to Opening Day after all. Considering all of the drama that happened last year, I feel quite indifferent towards the turn of events. A 10-year streak will come to an end this Friday. Maybe next year, I'll start a new one.

It's kind of a blessing in disguise, really. I really don't feel like dragging my kids all the way to the 500's watching amateur hour of all the dickheads getting belligerent. It's really not something you want to take the kids to year after year. We'll catch our beloved Jays when there aren't 50,000 drunk assholes looking for a fight, surrounding us.

Speaking of drunk assholes, I have an extra ticket to the Crystal Castles show on Saturday. Message me if you're interested.

Meet Your Blue Jays, 2011 Edition!

Starting Pitching

Ricky Romero
Brandon Morrow
Brett Cecil
Kyle Drabek
Jesse Litsch
(Brandon Morrow will start his season on the DL due to forearm soreness. Jo-Jo Reyes, who was picked up in the Yunel Escobar trade, will take his place.)


Jesse Carlson
Casey Janssen
Shawn Camp
Jon Rauch
Jason Frasor
Mark Rzepcynski
David Purcey
Frank Francisco

The Line-Up (in my opinion)

Rajai Davis CF
Aaron Hill 2B
Jose Bautista RF
Adam Lind 1B
Edwin Encarnacion DH
Travis Snider LF
Yunel Escobar SS
J.P. Arencibia C
Mike McCoy 3B


Jose Molina C
John McDonald IF


Meet Your Future Third Baseman!

Oh, Brett! How classy can you be?

Brett Lawrie just got sent down to Triple-A for some seasoning. No shit.

Buck Martinez, the Jays' colour guy saw him take a few hacks in spring training, and
said that this kid with his power will be in the major league roster this year. He just needs to thrive in the hitter's league that is the PCL, and we should see in in a Jays' lineup soon.

Bret Cecil, Junkballer?

Brett's diminished fastball is a concern. "Anybody in the league can hit 87," says Cecil, who uses his fastball to set up his other three off-speed pitches. Management and Brett insist that there is no injury, but it smells like another lefty who lost his fastball, then his job. He has a cologne in the Jays' Store. I think it's still there . . .

Maybe Cecil just needs to incorporate a new pitch to his arsenal. A real slow one, to offset the 87 mph heater that he currently has. Something that will eventually make it over the plate, just to give the hitters another look. Just saying.

It looks like it's going to be a fun summer! We'll see you in the 500's! Go Jays!

Sunday, March 20, 2011

With Teef!

When I'm not blogging, I'm just wandering around checking this site:

shark attack monitor

I've always had a fascination with sharks ever since I was little. There was a picture of my mom in the Pacific and me trailing behind her. I'm the bubbly silhouette under water, drowning. I was quite aware of who we were sharing the waters with.

Monday, March 14, 2011

Dream Stadiums!

Again, I apologize for the lack of posts. The whole fam-dam took turns to shake of this miserable cough-cold-sucky-fucky condition that always ALWAYS comes with our stupid Canadian Winter.

To keep you busy, go check out It's a portfolio site by a hobbyist named Marc Gilbert, who presents a clean modern aesthetic that once were the norm of baseball stadiums.

Of course, we are in the era of retro-style brick facades with tinges of what Ebbets', or a Fenway, or a Wrigley had, which was character and charm, making the aforementioned seem less special, because to the glut of copycat hardball yards.

What is your dream stadium?

Monday, March 7, 2011

Doc Being Funny While Hawking Video Games . . .

Found this on the interwebs through @dustinparkes of @drunkjaysfans fame.

Check it out:

Also, thanks to tumblrer @mightyflynn for the baseball pics. I'll be posting a ton of images from his tumblr. Check him out over here: mightyflynn

Sunday, March 6, 2011

Travis Snider = Fat Fuck

Nothing much to post here, so I figured I'd post Snider's 25 ounce steak binge. He polished that bitch off in less than 5 minutes. Fellow tubby motherfucker Jesse Litsch pictured beside him, was witness to this act.

Now if he's only shave off that pussy-duster moustache next . . .

Follow Travis on his daily, 'Man vs. Food,' escapades here:


He posted everything he ate over the Christmas Holidays. It was quite impressive.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Things That Keep Me Busy

I do apologize for the lack of posts. Sometimes, I just have to catch up on life.

And my Theremin.

My Stylophone.

And my spankin' new Trigger Finger!

- If you feel the need for more posts from yours truly, check out my tumblr page. It's kind of a picture and video blog. I'm there more often than here, because I rarely get long-winded enough to put things into words.

- Like the snazzy new banner? Me too! It's one of my favourite places to go in this world! You should check out a game there.